I have several remote friends I talk to on a regular basis at Medium.com. We've been pen pals for a couple of years now, and I don't want to give that up. On the other hand, I also have a Substack page that I post my weekly video podcasts to, along with the written commentary about what that week's show topic is about.

I'm getting tired of writing and creating these weekly podcasts, that go nowhere. There are a handful of people who tune in, and I'm very grateful for every one of them. Both on Substack, and Medium. I even have a couple of paid subscribers on Substack, that I would hate to lose. I have quite a few free subscribers there as well, that I don't wish to disappoint.

But, what is the point? I initially started writing for Medium.com back in June of 2022? I think? I had no idea what I was doing, but I thought, maybe writing would make me feel better about things, And, to a degree, it did, until recently.

This year, with everything that's going on, I just want to tune out all of the excess noise coming from the Trump government. I used to write about it, then, my writing just became more noise, like chaff in the wind. I found myself just repeating what we have all been hearing in the news, so I stopped doing that at the beginning of the summer.

I have tried to find other topics to talk about that might be interesting to people, but I find myself asking myself, why am I working so hard at something that used to be fun? It's not like I'm trying to get paid for this or anything!

In the four years I've been writing about stuff, I have made less than $50 from Medium.com. I have made slightly more on Substack, but that's only because of their different subscription program. I just consider it tipping, to be honest.

I'm not complaining about the lack of earnings from writing. I never set out to make money from writing, and I still don't expect anything. But, it's still starting to feel like work, and that's the problem. Why am I working for free? I don't mind pursuing a hobby that''s fun for free, but when that hobby starts to feel more like a job,.something needs to change.

That's why I'm seriously thinking about changing things up in a serious way when my Substack subscription comes up for renewal next year. I'm seriously thinking about scaling back on my writing and podcasting starting next spring when my StreamYard subscription comes up for renewal. That's very expensive. Around $450 a year expensive. Which is fine for those serious podcasters who are making money off of podcasting, which I'm not.

I have a less expensive, more work intensive, way to still create video podcasts, without Streamyard, that I want to try starting next year. I have to take some time to experiment, and teach myself how to use this software to create something close to what I have with Streamyard, and I think I can get pretty close.

I'm also thinking that I may stop writing for Substack next year. I'm getting tired of writing, then copying and pasting my weekly podcasts to both Substack and medium every week. Like I said, it's really starting to feel like a drudgery job we hate to go to work at every day. I'm starting to dread Wednesday's now. That's the day I record and publish my weekly podcasts.

I like to start writing them on Sunday's, when I supposedly have some free time. But here lately, I haven't had that much free time, and now, I feel like I'm under pressure to meet a weekly deadline. Like a real job! It might take some of the edge off if I were making some money off all of this, but as I'm basically working for free, where is the incentive to continue working so hard? I don't see it.

After my enforced three week hiatus from writing recently, I have stopped to think about this for a change. I've stopped the mindless Wednesday deadline, and I'm thinking long and hard about what I want to do, as these expensive subscriptions start to expire.

One of the thoughts I'm giving some real thought to, is to stop writing for Substack, despite my subscribers there. I have more there than I do with Medium.com, and I've been writing for Medium a lot longer. That should tell you something.

I've read another article on Medium recently, about how one writer is also giving up his Substack. He says it has gone to the celebrity writers, and for the rest of us, it's the boneyard. The main reason I have over three hundred subscribers (all but two are free subscribers), is because of referrals primarily from Thom Hartmann. He's pretty famous on Substack, and he runs quite a production there. But, he has a production crew that helps him produce and publish his daily radio show there. So does Chris Hedges, and the large international crew at Zeteo. I can't possibly compete with anything like that.  Chis Armitage and his Existentialist Republican daily political newsletter is another example. He has a crew, with lot's of money behind him.

Independent journalists like Ken Klippenstein, also have some production and editorial assistance, but little 'ole me, nada. It's just me. No one around to help, nor did I go out seeking any. I'm not complaining. As I said, I didn't start all of this to try and make a large pot of money out of this, like another income source. I just wanted to make my voice heard. I wanted to write, then talk about the things that mattered to me, and a lot of people like me.

You know, the middle class, and the not so middle class. I kind of fall into that grey area where I don't quite have a middle class income by today's standards, but I do take in enough to live comfortably, as long as I don't splurge very often. This year, my expenses went a little above my comfort level and I had to forego a decent vacation this spring.

A large part of which was due to the higher gas prices. We typically go on vacation with our not so gas friendly RV. The price tag was too much for us this year with the war in Iran jacking prices up more than a dollar an imperial gallon in the U.S. this spring, compared to before Trump started the war. We might sneak out for a long weekend this fall, if I can save a little money. That's a big if right now. But, I digress, again.

I really want, is to find the free time to finish writing my second book. I have only managed to write about three or four chapters this year, so far, and that's eating at me. I want to finish the first draft so I can get someone else to edit it for me. I want to be able to publish it next year.

I also want to work on finding more time to continue advertising my first book. And I need more than a small advert in my Substack and Medium posts to do that. I need to actually get out into the public sphere and sell some books. I sold four copies in one afternoon, at a showing at my local Barnes Noble Books store last July. With the right marketing material, and some assistance, I need more venues like that. But, in order to do that, I need free time to travel to these events. Something I don't have when I'm doing a weekly podcast.

So you can see my conflict. I need a change. I think moving away from podcasting on Substack is the right move. I will let my Streamyard subscription run out next spring and try something different. I probably won't write as much, because I don't see the point anymore. I will still read all of my favourites when they post something, and reply when I read something I feel warrants a response. That won't change.

But, the weekly podcast will come to an end, and I'll do something else with my time. Such as write more short stories and novels perhaps? I still plan to create some videos now and again. when there is something worth talking about. But, no more rigid weekly schedules, and posts on social media. Which I never liked anyway. It's gotten to the point that I hate posting on social media, such as BlueSky, Substack Notes, and Facebook and so forth. I won't miss that at all.

What I'm contemplating is taking back my freedom from feeling obligated to do a weekly podcast that few watch, or listen to. I'm just another voice in the winds of change around the world. Few know I'm there, and I'm just more noise on the internet, that few pay attention to. Mostly because I sound like all the rest. I don't have anything unique to say, that more famous people than I, are already saying. And they get paid to say it.

Anyway, I've said my piece this week. This is what I'm thinking about on this 25th anniversary of 9/11. Not about the politics, and the memorial ceremonies and so on, but personal changes. I will never forget where I was, and what I was doing on that fateful morning on September 11th, 2001. For most of us who are old enough to remember what happened that day, we won't forget where we were, and what we were doing that morning. After listening to all of the crap on the U.S. news this week about today's anniversary, I finally tuned it out and did other mundane things around the house. Other than seeing a flag at half mast at my local grocer today, and a local restaurant sticking a bunch of little flags in the grass outside of their business, it was just another day in the neighbourhood, as long as you didn't watch the news.

Take care of yourselves out there, anyone who may read this. If we don't take care of ourselves, no one else will. And that is the point of today's blog post. I have decided that I need to take better care of myself, as no one else will. I'll talk again when I have something else to say. Sláinte